‘Are you Prepared?’

On Wednesday and Thursday Chris Forder and I attended a Prepare/Enrich marriage preparation and enrichment course. This was mostly for us to be better at doing marriage preparation with engaged couples, but it should also help us to help you in having a more enriching marriage (while not being a ‘magic quick-fix’). I am also looking forward to Renee and I putting into practice some of what the course covers, and enriching our marriage. Whilst on that subject, here’s one simple but helpful exercise you can do if you’re married. …

Draw up a ‘wish-list’ of 3 things you would like to do/like your spouse to do, in your marriage. Each person tells their spouse one ‘wish’ and how they believe that ‘wish’ coming true would help their marriage. Then you talk about whether you both want to make the wish happen, and if so, what steps you can take to make it so.

It’s a simple tool (but there actually are a few more steps to it), but it enables us as married persons to express what’s on our hearts and minds, and can help us to have the sort of communication that we should regularly have in our marriages. If you’re not married, you could do the same sort of thing with a friend.

The famous Scouts motto is “Be Prepared”, and the more prepared we can help engaged couples to be, the better their marriages should be, and hopefully the less bad marriages and divorces there will be — but the knowledge and skills for preparing for a good marriage are also for enriching current marriages. So …

How about this week you and your spouse (or a friend) draw up a ‘wish-list’. Don’t make it an exercise in selfishness, but make your first wish something for your marriage/friendship that you could do. Then ‘wish’ for something that both of you can do to enrich your relationship. Be realistic and be positive. But ‘prepare’ to invest in your marriage or friendship to make it better.

Cameron Wills

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